Listening to Brandon and a certain antiquitous bibliophile discuss purchasing tactics when using eBay reminded me of second grade. And Mrs. Prestwich's class.
Mrs. Prestwich was the cool teachers in our school. The class operated on a complex rewards system, where studeants would earn (for meritable tasks) the currency of power in her domain: Prestwich Bucks. These spectacular denominations would be hoarded until the Friday afternoon auction. As the week of schoolwork would wind down, the tensions of our young capitalistic furor would wind up. Every Friday afternoon featured an auction of toys and assorted goods (bowling ball, wallets, makeup kits, card games, etc.). Occasionally, there would be some magnificent item on auction that everybody wanted. Everybody. And, let me tell you, only the rich would rule that day. Or would they?
This is where Brandon's talk of strategy comes in. It is also where we find proof of the villainous nature of even the sweetest children (of which I was one). Knowing that I was far from the wealthiest student in the class, both in the real world and in the microcosm of Mrs. Prestwich's economy, I needed to come up with an equalizer. A means to allow my middleclass self to obtain the toys and luxuries to which I hoped to become accustomed. Hence, the strategy.
I would bid on everything. Whether lipstick or legos, pinwheels or purses. Whatever it was, I would bid on it, forcing those who really wanted said item to spend more than they would under normal circumstances. A purse that would have, without interference, gone for 35 PB now sold for 75 PB. A bag of army men that would have gone for 50 PB was now dearly bought at 115 PB. In this fashion, by raising prices and then pulling out quickly, I successfully whittled down the opposition for the big-ticket items. With everyone spending more than they needed to on the things they kinda wanted, they wouldn't have the necessary dough to compete for the real deal. And so, in second grade, I walked away with some pretty cool swag. Only now, do I realize how awful that was of me to do. And greedy.
Kids, man. Don't you just kinda wanna punch 'em in the gut?
p.s., lest it be believed that my plans never went awry, I should point out that a couple times I stopped paying close enough attention and so wound up paying far more than I - or anyone - should have for 1) a woman's wallet, 2) a bowling ball (and bag), and 3) Malibu Ken. I suppose being an incessant daydreamer stopped me from going to far with my visionary ideas. Come to think of it, I have similar difficulties in my life even to this day - very easily distracted (so I don't very often finish books or embark on wildly ambitious projects).
